its late and its unbearably hot and im supposed to be asleep so thisll be rather vomity and embarrassing.
my sleep schedule? destroyed. my art? evolving. my relationship with it? knotty. my skin? SHAVED!!! hallelujah!
i think the first memorable thing i did today was watch an episode of Black Mirror. i was watching some random youtube videos and came across an upload discussing the episode, talking about how it held the GREATEST TWIST IN MODERN HORROR, which made me roll my eyes btu but the video was decent. it certainly had me intrigued! so i decided to actually watch the thing, something i usually never do with these kinds of videos. real proud of that action shoutout me. and.. the episode was GREAT. seriousylyy! it felt a little cheap at times but the cinematography was so nice. the score was really cool. the twists... god... they left me all confused and dizzy and it felt sick! the ending was sort of sad, but it was a seriously good time. honestly got me interested in the show. i might watch it once i get a hard drive big enough to store all the episodes. oh also the episode im talking about is called Playtest, episode 2 of season 3. it reminded me a lot of my relationship with dreams and how they felt. im sure thats not an uncommon interpretation.
(sorry if the website is formatted like shit im new to this. probably will stay new to this) the music today. hmm. i tried mashing, didnt really work, but its okay it often happens. ill try mashing with Twilight Pretender someday. i seriously seriously love that song. one of the most sentimental. i also listened to James Ferraro's 2020 bootleg titled "Hollywood Vishnu", im listening to it right now as a matter of fact, and yeah its yeah its great. 17 minutes long a real doozy. is that how yo spell doozie. dooz.y. whatever. its not on RYM (the bootleg not the word) so ill rate it right here. 4/5 stars, 8.5, very cathartic. very relistenable. makes me feel great and sad and cold and thats impressive cause my room is hot as shit! also, sort of related to the music thing, i deleted twitter off my phone last night out of shame for my unpleasant tweets and suspicious-looking retweets. i did so while listening to STANDING ON THE CORNER II (2025), one of my favorite albums ever probably im not sure. its a grower, it grew, and its great. gr gr gr
also, ive been trying to come up with an idea for a MIXTAPE. i dont think im ready for a solo release, and i think releasing it under The would be much cooler. The is a collective where everybody is anonymous and its awesome. well i just told you im apart of The so that kind of ruins it somewgat but like, who cares! anyways im was thinking about which sort of sound i wanted for the tape and Hmmm i dont know. i wanna do multiple things. ambient, IDM, mashup (definitely that one), and trap are definitellyyy in consideration. ill probably do all of them , like a boss ,
its late im gonna go to bed goodbye. remember me...
i have been really anxious about twitter and the fact it holds most of my humiliating & embarrassing behavior from 2024-june2025, so i have decided to get away from it for some time. i will be trying to consistently update this website from time to time with my thoughts on topics like music, school, life in general and and and bleugeuhgh categorizing these things is kind of stupid who cares let's stop talking about it.
i have put a lot of effort trying to keep up with 2025`s Crushing stream of MUSIC. hundreds of albums heard, most of them catalogued (https://rateyourmusic.com/~chug42), with maybe 20 of them really impacting me in any meaningful way. i wish Music was BETTER. also, the year-end list i've been trying to construct over the course of a few months is wrapping up production SOON! in like, 3 days. will ALSO be released in 3 days. i am quite proud of it. i'd also like to share my thoughts on the albums and why i enjoyed them so much, but that's kind of really difficult. i don't know. i'm not much of a review type of person.
following the list's publishment, i will freak the fuck out. tremendous amounts of music will be awaiting me next year... eager to disassemble me piece by piece. eating them (the pieces) RAW like some sort of... meaniehead... art is crooked. seriously. house, funk, IDM, jazz, collage, and singer-songwriter are particularly amusing to me currently, and i plan to focus on those guys when the year turns.
i have also been reading homestuck as you can tell. hopefully this is not just a "phase". i don't like the idea of phases. in a perfect world, i'd stay in one singular mood forever. change is CHEAP and not worth my time. i consistently regret everything i do and it is super frustrating!!!!!!
i think that's the end of my first entry here. i don't have much to talk about. i am listening to Wall i Was by Naked Flames as i write this, a really entertaining outsider house album. it will likely end up on the lower spots of my year-end list.
ok thats all https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wn80Azit_mA